HALLOWE'EN = SHE'S CRAFTY

So,much like the Beastie Boys inspiring me to let my Jr. High badd ass out once in a while and uhhhget funky, Halloween brings out my inner crafting nerd. Those close to me know I'm a novice crafter for sure, but each Halloween I get a little further out of my creative comfort zone.
Every fall, I pick a handful of crafts to add to my growing collection of decor for my FAVORITE holiday.Some family friendly for the kiddos, and some all me. This year, adding a training schedule, a new duty station and the Rangers making the playoffs AND into the World Series has really put a damper on me getting this blog posted sooner. Needless to say, my priorities are a little wack.Usually I have a theme for our crafting, but this year it was kind of willy-nilly, picking and choosing things I thought looked cool. Last year, we went in a Day of the Dead direction (Check out the archives section --->) and those cool crafts made a cameo in this years decorating.

With just a week to go 'till trick-or-treater's grace my doorstep, I have finally had to stop myself and just be happy with whats been done thus far. After all, I don't need to add to my too-many-storage-bins, and this post is temporary.

So one of my favorite crafts this year was this Craft Pumpkin OWL

Isn't this adorable?? I started with a black craft pumpkin, found at most craft stores (like Micheal's, Hobby Lobby).
I used fake flowers I had for the eyes,first piercing the craft pumpkin with a nail, and pushing the stem through. You may need to glue the flowers in place.
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For the beak and ears, I used the leaves that were on the flower bunches. I folded a larger leave almost in half, and glue-gunned it into place. I then glued the "ears" to a toothpick, folding the bottom point up, so the bottom was flat. I pierced the craft pumpkin with a nail and pushed the toothpicks into place. SUPER EASY AND SO FREAKING CUTE!!! I wanted to make more, but the kids stole the other two craft pumpkin from me :(

Decoupaged TV Trays

I had two crappy TV Trays I picked up from a thrift store that I had high hopes for, but alas, they just sat in a corner, in all their ugliness. Once we got settled in the new house, i thought, " this is the perfect time to make these TV trays less ugly". The original idea was to decoupage them with pin-up pictures, but after spraying them with a black primer, I thought they would make a great Halloween prop.

I had this picture form an earlier craft. It's actually from an old calendar and I love the old school charm it had, plus it's a thicker paper, whch makes it perfect for this craft.

Finished product after about 6 layers of Modge-Podge.I think I did this during a play off game that went into extra innings, giving me plenty of time between coats to let it dry. Since I only used one tray, the other will be something spectacular soon (she says with determination).

Bottles of Potions and Poisons

I'm sure you've seen this done a hundred times in all the Halloween magazines, or October issues of whatever you subscribe too. We HAD to make this one to compliment our new computer-cabinet-turned-bar.
I found the two decorative bottles at a local thrift store, cleaned them out and added some stickers the kids picked out. We filled them with Good'N Plenty candy for the "pills". The smaller jar is actually an old spice jar we filled with gummy worms (that keep disappearing!)The goblet is an old decoration we've had for years, with (plastic) spiders and snakes crawling out of it, and in the far back, I have an older Partylites vase with votive holder filled with one of our favorite treats:candy corns.It's all resting on a shiny silver charger (from the Goodwill) This is not a very good picture, but it serves it purpose.

Banister craft as seen in Halloween Trick and Treats 2011 magazine (Better Homes and Gardens special interest magazine, couldn't find a link)
These were supposed to come out much fluffier, but, I did let the kids do this one after experimenting with what worked best for us. I really tried to use what I already had, but found the original idea was a bit too involved for little hands, so we changed it up a bit and came up with this:

I meant to take pics of the step-by-step process, but I can break it down for you here
We used paper doilies and coffee filters. I spray painted the smaller doilies black for added detail. We layered the items as seen,experiment to find a looks you like. I suggest using way more filters for a fuller look. We secured them all together with a large embellished brad for ease and to finish the look, and I affixed them to our small banister with double sided heavy duty tape. The kids LOVED doing this. They really took their time and it was cool to watch them problem solve, and get creative with their pieces.
TIP** I would use a hole bunch or scissors to punch/cut a small hole in the middle of each layer to make it easier to get the brad through.

Poison Apples
This is less a craft and more of me stealing something I saw in a catalog and LOOOOOOOOVED. My kids love apples. It seems we always have them in the house, so i thought this was just too cute to pass up.

So, basically this is my trifle dish, without the stand and some fancy font in word, cut out and taped on to make the kids "treat" a "trick"! More goulish paper would have been cooler, but all that craps still packed away and I wasn't about to go digging in piles of boxes for one piece of paper.

Also, in this picture is a beautiful old lace tablecloth I picked up at the post thrift store, and added 4 sheets of laminated scrapbook pages ($1.99 at Micheal's) to set our table. My tab;e is rectangular, but the tablecloth is more oblong, which gives the set up an old, vintage look.

Stuff not seen are the really cool lace curtains I used as swags ($3 at the post thrift), some random decorations, and my porch, but nothing really very crafty. I had to put the curtains up, since we don't actually have any window treatments. Derek gave me the "no-go" on that since our time here is limited. I affixed the swags with reusable adhesive tabs and some old plastic shower curtain hooks. So, take THAT "minimal decorating".

If you're crafty, leave a comment with your favorite craft this (or any) year, and if you just love to decorate with all the cool stuff in the stores, post what your favorite purchase is/has been! I love getting new ideas!! It's never to early to start thinking about NEXT year .... (maniacal laughter...)

Empty calories, or feelings... I'm not sure

Do you know what this is? Besides 360 empty calories? It’s a Krispy Kreme chocolate frosted crème filled doughnut. It was also my lunch. Why would I do such a thing? Why would I knowingly eat something so bad for me, when I have plenty of nutritious food for me in my kitchen?I write a BLOG on whole foods!!! Why was this effing thing stale?!?!

After paying for this with cash, to not leave an electronic trail, and stuffing it into my face in the car, in the parking lot of the place I purchased it of course immediately feeling guilt, I pondered on what brought me to such a low point at only 11:00 in the morning.

For starters, we have been waiting a month for our internet to work. A MONTH. Sure, some people find wi-fi a luxury, but in this house, it’s a necessity. I have queries to submit and writer’s guidelines to research. We’ve been using our phones wi-fi hotspot function since August to do everything from banking to school help for the kids. It’s slooooooooow to say the least. So when you’ve made 7 different appointments, used 2 different companies and have intermittent internet usage, it’s frustrating to say the least. I missed two deadlines this morning. One was a personal goal; one could have been a paying submission. Both we re equally stressful.

Maybe it’s the lack of lower numbers on the scale, despite all my running and calorie counting and whole foods diet. It’s like a punch in the stomach every time I get on that scale and see the 4 lbs I lost last week back on there… over and over. Then again, I guess if I wasn’t shoving cupcakes and Krispy Kremes in my face, this would be a non issue.

Maybe living in Virginia is taking it’s toll? I miss good customer service – this is nonexistent here. We have had issues with EVERY major utility AND purchase since we moved in. It took 2 tries (and two companies) to get our washer and dryer delivered, 3 visits to get our cable hooked up, 7 tries (fingers crossed) for our internet to work. We’ve been stood up, hung up on and “whatever”’d. And there is nothing we can do about it but complain.

Or… the lack of a good radio station. It’s Gospel, Country, R&B and a station that loves the Eagles and ZZ Top a little too much. Sometimes you just need to crank up the music to a really good song. But really, who still listens to the radio? I should just plug in my phone/Ipod like every one else.


But the crescendo, or maybe the only REAL issue here, is that one of my kids is having a really tough time in school. She’s miserable. New school, new curriculum, new way of doing things. The south is a little less…err, liberal… than the west coast. Teaching styles are different. She’s used to being “the good kid”. Teachers knew her, and they knew me. Here, she’s just another new kid. It’s not abnormal for her to get an F. Not to them. And it certainly doesn’t warrant a call/email/note home, as it would have before. Her self esteem is affected, she’s embarrassed to ask for more help at school and unfortunately, Derek and I don’t know jack about Virginia history. So, this morning, after letting her stay home an hour due to “an upset tummy” I tried to talk to her about why it was she was avoiding class today. Total epic meltdown ensued. It was awful. She was crying and pleading.
“ I hate it here…teachers are mean… home school me”
And I did the typical thing of getting frustrated with her –after I asked her to open up to me- and yelled at her out of frustration.
“This is our life now”. I said. “Washington is gone, it’s in the past, and you need to deal with this change”.
I felt like a total jerk. I tried to make up for it on the ride to school, but she was done with me, and I didn’t blame her. It’s hard to see our kiddos in pain. It’s hard to not be able to fix it right away. But I also have to let her learn things on her own. To fix things on her own. To adapt to change.

In all honesty, I can say I was eating my feelings, dealing with stress by comforting myself with chocolaty pastries. But in reality I had been coveting this stupid doughnut since I saw them in a package of 8 at the commissary. The only reason I hadn’t really given in was because I didn’t want a whole pack, I just wanted the one. And once I saw that I could purchase just one at the local Class Six the decision was made. It was just a matter of time before I made one of these my biotch.I was just waiting for the perfect excuse.

To try to even out my bad decisions today, I talked to the school counselor, made a conference appointment with Ru’s teachers AND parked super far out in the lot when I went to the commissary. That's all the fixing I can do for one day.

2:07:41

Is it strange that my time for the ARMY ten miler is eerily close to my birth date?
Is it stranger that I completed the Army Ten miler? I mean, after all, it was TEN miles. Ten miles of mostly jogging, mixed with some serious running and less than a 1/2 mile of non-consecutive walking. It was amazing. Amazing for so many reasons, but mostly for the reason that I FINISHED IT. I have a coin, a shirt and a certificate to prove it, and although 30,000 people trek to this event each year, I am still in a small group that can proudly claim " I was there".
ARMYTENMILER CLASS OF '11.

We arrive Saturday late afternoon. We head directly over to the D.C. Armory, where race packet pick up is being held and I marvel at all the refurbished row houses and the open air markets in this cute neighborhood. I also take notice that despite the Indian Summer we seem to be having, the leaves are starting to tint orange...red...yellow. The Armory is also the site of a health expo that coincides with the race.I hop out to get the packets while Derek finds a place to park. Seeing static displays are second nature to me,so I think it's really cool when I hear people get excited about the helicopter, stryker, soldiers. I also think it's really cool that I get to bypass the long lines to enter the expo by showing my military ID at the side door. Membership has it's privileges.

Packet pick-up is super organized, and each line I need to be in seems to be the fastest moving. I quietly hope it is a sign of how my running will be. I laugh at myself for having such ostentatious fantasies. Derek and I pick up our race shirts, then head over to the merchant booths to see if there's anything we can't live without. I find a few shirts with witty slogans ("in my dreams, I'm a Kenyan", " This seemed like a good idea 3 months ago", ) and I get my first real wave of nervousness.
As we drive through the city to our hotel, I try to navigate the area from memory. It's been several years since we explored here, and some things have changed, but I still know my way around. We pass the Watergate complex,and I make a joke about being deepthroat. Derek seems unimpressed, but I know he thinks it's funny.
We check in, get up to our room, only to realize OUR room is actually someone else's room, and thank God we didn't walk in on someone having a little late afternoon delight, or getting out of the shower, or picking their nose. Back down the oldest elevator in the free world, new room, up elevator, room is free of other people. We forgo a late reservation at the Italian place across the street for a walk a block over to Whole Foods to pick up dinner. I get brown rice, mac&cheese and a salad, and later lament " carbs... why did I load you?!?" I take a warm bath, center myself and head off to bed while Derek watches the Rangers game get delayed. In a few short hours, I will put my training to the test.

5am comes early, and I am not a morning person. Banana and almond butter for breakfast, followed by coconut water and really shitty coffee. I make a mental note to stop at Starbucks on the way to the metro, but immediately dismiss that thought in fear of throwing it up, or worse, having to poo in a port-o-potty. No thanks.
Running skirt? Check! Wrist sweat band? Check! Totally lame sunglasses? Check! I decide not to wear a long sleeve shirt, even though the morning is supposed to be chilly. I figure my fear of the metro, and nervous energy will keep me warm enough.
It actually ends up being surrounded by hundreds,thousands of runners that does the trick.
The metro is packed (and surprisingly clean and well-lit), standing room only. It takes about 15 minutes to get out of the Pentagon station once we arrive. The lines to the port-o-potties are so long, we fear missing our start time. We finally get to the starting area, and I realize I'm terribly thirsty. WHY DIDN'T I BRING WATER??? It's 20 more minutes before we start moving, and even then, it's a 1/2 mile walk to the starting line. I'm stretching, getting crazy loose and my nervous energy subsides into excitement. While I'm sure there are "elite" runners here, they are waaaaaaay up ahead of me, their start time already on the clock. Most people around me seem pretty normal. Except the one douche bag making fun of people for having water belts/GU/supplements on them. "It's only 10 miles" he says. Ok, cool guy... I'll see YOU at the finish line. I also regret Derek not having his water belt, my throat is so dry.
And we're off. To a slow and steady pace. We had trained on a 10/2 system of running 10 minutes, walking 2. We decide to run for 2 miles, then see how we feel. I feel like walking,and 2 minutes later we're heading towards mile three. We have already passed the Lincoln Memorial, Arlington Bridge, two water stations (amen) and are heading towards Watergate. I ask Derek if we can just go back to our hotel. He laughs at me. My lame sunglasses keep fogging up. I hate them. But it's bright, and squinting sucks.
The goal is to get to mile 5 before the 1:20 mark, because that's when they cut people off, shorten the course and you don't get to complete the full ten. We get their in plenty of time only to hear someone shout we have 2/10 of a mile to go (ummm... did they change the rule?!?! The course?!?! WTF?!?!). I break into a run. It probably wasn't fast, but it was much faster than my current pace AND my training pace. I was not about to get cut off now. I pushed past mile 6...

...then I drank the Gatorade. I knew not to gulp. On all the previous water stations, I swished and spit, taking just enough water in to hydrate and not cramp. But this time, my fatigue and thirst got the batter of me (it was SOOO hot!!). I didn't mean to do it, I had no control over my actions. And the next thing I knew, three cups of Gatorade were gone. It was time to walk. I begged Derek for a 1/2 mile to let the fluids... I don't know, disappear, maybe? Just time to not have them sloshing in my belly. I was sure, if I started running, that Gatorade was going to make a second appearance. He gave me 1/4 mile. That's all I needed. We got back to a comfortable (slow) pace, and watched as mile marker 7, then 8 went by. We joked and talked to other runners as we jogged up the ramp to the George Mason Memorial Bridge. We were almost done.
Then, we came into view of the wounded warriors. How do you quit (or slow down) when you see persons with one leg, no legs, running? How do you tell yourself, it's too hot, it's too hard, it's too far? You don't. Because these guys are still going. There was a moment, when one of these warriors with a running prosthetic had to stop and take a minute, and he was apologizing to his (two legged) team mates. And I wanted to say, " Do you know how amazing you are? You have one LESS needed limb for running, yet you're still doing it." That is my only regret of the day, that I didn't actually say it. Instead, I dug a little deeper, ran a little straighter, complained a little quieter. Became a little prouder. Not of myself, but of humanity. I ran the last three miles of this race, not stopping,no 10/2 training plan, because I knew I could.
Mile 9 marker goes by... just one more mile. Literally, this time. Derek starts to get giddy. He's cheering me, but I'm still focused on my pace. I'm hot, so hot, and sore already and a mile is still pretty far. I want the finish line, and water. We can see the Pentagon, the finish line balloons.I say out loud that I think I have pulled my uterus. Derek grabs my hand and I think to myself, "I actually did it". Hands clasped, arms up, we pass over the finish line. I think it's 2:30:and change because that's what the clock says. I forget that we started way after the time clock. I'm elated, exhausted, thirsty. We have to walk FOREVER through the chutes, passed piles of empty water bottles and discarded water pallets. I'm feeling woozy and I swear it's getting hotter. We walk passed shade and into blacktop parking lots. We get our coins, then, miraculously, water. I take two.
We start to make out way back to the metro. All I want is a juicy hamburger then a cupcake. I deserve it. My legs are so sore, and I have chaffing and aches in unusual places. WE hop a fence, then some concrete barriers and I'm amazed I can still command my lower half to function. I stop and stretch. I need to stop, but I'm afraid if I do stop, I won't get going again. I stretch some more.We see the masses heading down into the metro and I fear I will starve to death before we make it back to Foggy Bottom.
After a series of both fortunate, and unfortunate, events, we finally sit our sweaty, stiff selves into cushioned seats for a burger. We see people who recognize us from the 6:30am metro ride,they, too still have their race bibs on. They appear less sweaty, less taxed,more comfortable than I.
As we walk back to the hotel, people congratulate us. I want to shower, then sleep. But we have 45 minutes to be out of the hotel, and Derek has promised me a trip to Georgetown Cupcakes for my race award. I get the chocolate coconut,Derek gets the red velvet. We pick carrot cake to share later, and three more for the kids makes it an even 1/2 dozen.
As we make our way back towards the highway, we decide we would love to live here. And we start talking about "next year". Making plans to come back to D.C. before our 6months is up. Making plans for our next race,I tell myself 10 miles is the most I will ever need to run. By Monday, I will have contemplated training for a half marathon. By Tuesday, I will decide my recovery period is over and make plans for a 2.5 mile run Wednesday morning.

You don't have to be thin, or an athlete or even have two legs to run. You just have to do it. 2:07:41 says so.